Speak Now or Forever Hold Your Peace
by I'dBeDelighted
Summary: Why did Julia's father not walk her down the aisle when she married Darcy?
1. Chapter 1

" _It's so good to finally make your acquaintance, Darcy. Julia has spoken so highly of you. And now I can see that she's right. She's a lucky woman."_

" _I'm a lucky man, Ruby. I'm enjoying my position at the Victoria Hospital for Sick Children and I'm about to have your sister's hand in marriage. I'm content."_

" _Content? And would you be content to settle in Toronto for the long term?"_

" _If Julia wishes it."_

" _Really?"_

" _If she's happy, then I'm happy."_

" _How selfless of you."_

" _What do you mean?"_

" _Are you sure that you're fine if Julia were to remain working so closely with Detective Murdoch?"_

" _Of course. Why wouldn't I be fine with that?"_

" _Well, given their past romantic relationship."_

" _Their what?"_

" _Oh, I ... I thought you knew."_

" _Well, um... Water under the bridge. Well, the hour's getting late. It was a pleasure meeting you, Miss Ogden. Good night."_

xxxXxxx

Ruby sat bewildered. Jules told her she had spoken to Darcy about William. Why would she lie about that? Why keep it a secret? He was bound to find out eventually and now it was she that had let it out. It was obvious that Jules still loved William. Had she even talked to him about her situation or had she once again made a unilateral decision that he would be better off without her? …and why, when she could just stay single, was she was so insistent on marrying someone else? After meeting Darcy she wasn't sure what to think of him and as she sat contemplating her sister's situation her father, Dr. Lionel Ogden, slowly entered the room.

"So Ruby, what do you think of Dr. Garland?"

"I suppose he's alright." Ruby replied.

"Alright?"

Ruby shrugged her shoulders, "Let's just say he isn't the kind of man I would have expected Jules to marry."

Dr. Ogden sat down at the table opposite Ruby. "He's got a good career and he's from a good family…"

"Perhaps," Ruby conceded, "but is that the most important thing when considering marriage? He just doesn't come across as the kind of man that Jules would be interested in."

"And what exactly do you mean by that?"

"Jules needs a man that's devoted to her, puts her on a pedestal, would do anything for her. Darcy is … _content_ , does that sound like the kind of man that Jules would love?"

Dr. Ogden raised his chin and stared at Ruby. "I get the feeling you know something that I don't. Is there someone else—someone Julia does love? Someone that loves her, perhaps someone you think she _should_ marry?"

"I thought you would have known by now Father."

"Ruby, you know Julia doesn't talk to me, let alone confide in me. We've become … somewhat estranged."

Ruby just nodded and seemed defeated.

"Ruby," Dr. Ogden continued, "I was standing outside the doorway while you were talking to Dr. Garland."

"You _were_?" Ruby was surprised.

"Yes. I heard you tell Dr. Garland about Det. Murdoch."

"Oh…"

"Is this the Det. Murdoch that is always in the newspapers?" Dr. Ogden asked.

"Yes."

"He seems very capable, from what I can gather he's a self-made man. How long ago did they have a relationship? Does Julia love him … does he love her?"

Ruby was surprised at her father's reaction, she thought he wouldn't approve of William; while he was an intelligent, educated man he certainly couldn't be considered a member of 'society'.

Her father continued, "What went wrong? Is he the reason Julia left for Buffalo?"

Ruby nodded. "I don't know what went wrong," she lied.

Dr. Ogden got up to leave, he turned around at the doorway, "Have you tried talking to her?"

xxxXxxx

" _There you are. Did you sleep well?"_

" _No. You?"_

" _Too much on my mind."_

" _Um ... Jules, have you spoken with Darcy this morning?"_

" _Yes, on the telephone. Why?"_

" _I'm just curious if he spoke of me, voiced his opinion of our conversation last night and so on?"_

" _I believe he said you have a wild streak. But we know that, don't we?"_

" _And that's all?"_

" _Yes."_

" _Good. I'd hate to have made a poor first impression on him. Darcy seems a very understanding man. Has Father taken to him?"_

" _I'm sure he's just relieved to finally see me married off. To whom is just a detail."_

" _I doubt he would be as relieved were it to a policeman, regardless of William's many accomplishments."_

" _That's not an issue now, is it?"_

" _Indeed. If you had truly loved William, you would've married him."_

" _Ruby! How mean of you! You know I can't give William the life he wants, children, a family."_

" _I didn't mean to upset you."_

" _I've made my choice. I chose to move on. I chose to make my life without William so that he could have the life that he deserves. I can't go back now. Too much has happened. And I love Darcy."_

" _But not like you love William."_

" _I'm marrying Darcy. That should be answer enough. I'll not speak of this again, Ruby."_

xxxXxxx

Ruby found her father sitting in his study.

"I've tried talking to Jules Father, she's insistent on marrying Darcy. I just know this won't work out; she's lying to herself when she says she loves him. I think you should talk to her."

Dr. Ogden was surprised, "ME! And what good do you think that would do Ruby. She may be staying here at the moment but she hardly notices my existence. I very much doubt she'd want advice from me."

"Well Father, someone's got to knock some sense into her and it seems I can't, so … that only leaves you."

"For what it will be worth I suppose I could give it a try. I'll speak to her this evening."

xxxXxxx

After dinner Julia retired to her room, Ruby excused herself and Lionel remained at the table with Dr. Garland whilst Eleanor served the port. He made small talk, making sure enough time had elapsed until his glass was empty that he could politely excuse himself; he did so saying he was going to retire. As he left the room Ruby entered as they had planned. She was to keep Darcy busy downstairs whilst her father talked to Julia.

xxx

Julia sat at her dressing table staring into the mirror with unseeing eyes. No matter how much she told herself she was happy with her situation, how much she loved Darcy, she couldn't help thinking about William. Every time she saw him her heart ached. She wondered if he realized how much she still loved him. He seemed to have moved on but why hadn't he found another woman? She thought he was probably still upset that Anna had to leave. Whilst neither seemed to have made a move towards a relationship, understandable given she'd just lost her fiancé, she felt that with time they would have. Anna had admitted that she had fallen in love with William when he was in Bristol and it seemed she may still have feelings for him. Julia felt that Anna was the one for him … she really did like her and although it would have hurt seeing him with someone else she knew it was for the best, Anna could give him the family he craved—had it not been for the Black Hand.

She heard a knock at the door. Before answering she glanced at herself in the mirror and once again told herself _'I do love Darcy.'_

"Who is it?"

"Julia, it's your father; may I come in?"

Julia sighed. _What on earth could he want?_ "Come in," she reluctantly called.

Dr. Ogden gingerly entered the room closing the door behind him. Julia was surprised by his apparent nervousness, not one of his usual traits. He summoned up his courage—for courage was always needed when attempting to deal with his oldest daughter—and began to speak.

"Julia, I'll get right to the point; are you sure you should be marrying Dr. Garland?" Julia was just about to spit out a reply when he held up his hand. "Hear me out."

"Dr. Garland seems like a decent man and I'm sure he'd make a good husband for someone…"

"Someone?"

"…but I'm not sure that's you."

Julia was about to vehemently disagree when her father insisted, "No. Let me continue. Ruby has expressed concern that you're marrying for the wrong reasons, and she doesn't want you to regret what she thinks is a rash decision for the rest of your life."

"I knew it! Ruby is poking her nose in where it doesn't belong as usual." Julia interjected.

"I agree with her."

"You what? Did you put her up to talking to me this morning."

"I asked her if she had spoken to you," her father admitted.

"It's nobody's business who I marry."

"Maybe not but it seems to me that you don't love him. I've seen no true feelings for him and Ruby said _he_ described himself as _content_. Not exactly the sentiment I would have expected from a man about to be married, especially to a woman like yourself."

"Like myself Father? What do you mean like myself?"

"Let's be honest Julia, you're not exactly a shrinking violet. It seems to me you're 'too much' woman for him. How will you feel if he tries to control you?"

"Control me? He's moved from his home to Toronto to be with me because I'm happier here. Does that sound like the kind of man that would try and control me?"

"And why _are_ you happier here Julia?"

Julia didn't have an answer.

"Could it be because someone else is here? Someone that you would never see again if you moved to Buffalo? It's certainly not because you're nearer your family."

"What do you mean by that?"

"Why did you not tell Dr. Garland about your relationship with Det. Murdoch? What were you afraid of? If the relationship was in the past why hide it from him?"

Julia's mouth dropped open, "How did you know about William? Ruby told you didn't she!"

"It doesn't matter how I know. If you love Det. Murdoch why would you marry someone else? Has he done something to hurt or upset you? Even if he has is that good reason to marry someone else? Are you trying to spite him? Because if you are you'll have a good long while to regret your decision."

"The reason I left William is none of your business, nor Ruby's! I love Darcy, I'm marrying Darcy. I'm happy."

Dr. Ogden shook his head, "You don't seem very happy. If you're marrying Dr. Garland because you think he's a more appropriate husband then I suggest you rethink that. I thought you were more independent and rebellious than that."

"Why is everyone trying to stop me from marrying Darcy? _I love Darcy, I'm marrying Darcy!_ " Julia took a deep breath, "Now please Father, leave me alone." she pleaded.

"Believe it or not I do have your best interests at heart and want to see you happy. I don't want to see you make a mistake that you will have to live with for the rest of your life." With that he left, he didn't know what else to say.

xxxXxxx

Dr. Ogden couldn't sleep, his mind was working overtime. He was thinking of his own life and how he'd made a decision that, whilst he didn't completely regret it, he would have preferred if he'd followed his heart. He _had_ loved his wife, but not like he loved Caroline. Unfortunately circumstances were not in their favour and both had made the decision to marry according to convention, a partner that was deemed more appropriate. He wondered how Caroline was, where she was now, he thought about her every day. He didn't want his daughter to make the same mistake. Det. Murdoch may not be of the same social standing or background, he was even a Catholic if the newspapers were to be believed, but from what little he'd learned of him through the newspapers, and Ruby's opinion, he seemed like a decent, honourable, principled man and if he loved Julia, and she loved him, then he couldn't see where the problem lay. Ruby wasn't being as forthcoming as she could be given the circumstances. He was sure she knew more than she was saying. What could possibly have gone wrong?

xxxXxxx

Ruby was already at the breakfast table when her father entered the dining room. "Has Dr. Garland left for the hospital already?" he asked.

"Yes, he left a few minutes ago." Ruby replied. "Did you speak to Jules last night?"

"I did, for what it's worth."

"So she's just as determined to marry Darcy." She stated.

"I'm afraid so." Lionel replied. "Ruby, I don't know what we can do to stop this wedding but there's one thing for certain, I cannot give Julia away. I will not walk her down the aisle to this man. In fact I'm not sure I will attend the wedding."

"Father! Surely she deserves that no matter how much you object." Ruby was shocked at his stance.

"I have my reasons Ruby"

"I don't want to be present for that conversation Father. I expect Jules will be down soon. Will you tell her then?"

"I may as well get it over with as soon as possible. It won't go down well but she needs to know and it's only fair to tell her sooner rather than later."

They heard footsteps approaching the dining room. Ruby quickly rose from the table and excused herself with a "Good luck," to her father.

xxx

Julia entered the dining room and sat in the chair Ruby had just vacated.

"Good morning Julia," Lionel greeted her.

"Good morning Father," she greeted him reluctantly.

Just then Eleanor entered with a pot of tea; Dr. Ogden waited until she had left, "I lay awake last night, thinking of you and your upcoming wedding. Julia—I can't give you my blessing…"

"I wasn't asking for you blessing Father, it doesn't matter what you think." Julia's ire was rising.

"Why am I not surprised? Julia I cannot in good conscience walk you down the aisle. I will not give you away to a man that I feel doesn't deserve you, that is totally wrong for you and, it seems to me, you are marrying for the wrong reasons."

Julia rose, tipping over the chair, and stormed out of the room.

Ruby entered and put her hand on her father's shoulder, "That didn't go well."

Lionel shook his head.


	2. Chapter 2

_Fallenbelle2 requested a sequel exploring Julia's feelings when she realized why her father had objected to her marriage to Darcy. As it's a short piece I decided to make it a second chapter to the original._

* * *

Epilogue

This takes place after The Death of Dr. Ogden.

* * *

" _I've known your father for a very long time. Since we were both quite young."_

" _You said you'd just met."_

" _No, I knew him. I knew him before he knew your mother."_

" _What happened?"_

" _We both made choices. We er, took partners we thought were appropriate."_

" _Are you saying that my father never loved my mother?"_

" _No. No, no, not at all. I'm saying...your father and I shared something throughout our entire life. We knew that, even after we wed others, but we conducted ourselves properly."_

" _He never mentioned you."_

" _No, of course not. Our love was a secret…and…eternal. Not a day of my life went by when I did not think of him."_

"… _and he, you…?"_

" _I imagine so."_

xxx

 _Now I know_. Now I know why he was so persistent that I not marry Darcy. I was making the same choice that he had done. He knew that I would regret it just as, I imagine, he had done all those years. And after mother died and he was now free to love Caroline as he did before, _she_ wasn't free, _she_ was still married. What torture that must have been; the same torture I went through, knowing that William still loved me but I could do nothing, I was trapped in a marriage I had been warned not to enter into. Why didn't he tell me then? If he'd explained why he was so against the marriage; why he wouldn't walk me down the aisle to a man he knew was second best, to a man that ultimately, I didn't love enough—to a man that was _not_ William. And I, what did I do? I thought he was just trying to control me, trying to tell me how to live; as usual—in my mind—not wanting me to be happy. And in the end I wasn't happy—and it wasn't because of him but myself—my insistence on marrying Darcy, even though by then I knew that William still loved me, had always loved me, and would probably always love me. Why did I go through with it knowing all that. Would it have made any difference if he had told me? That he had done what I was about to do. That he had lived his life knowing his greatest love was out of reach … forever, and I was about to make that same mistake.

xxxXxxx

As usual reviews always welcome.


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